Author: Robert Baird
Source: articleage.com
The 'experts', face painting ideas for children
, have tried to evaluate me as a sufferer of this but found no such evidence or behavior. The same was true for all other mental or medical conditions, so they think 'witch' covers my condition in life; because I refuse to participate in the materially managed environment any more. We will not explore the horrors of the current forms of Inquisition in great detail in this book as it relates to me. That would definitely be too serious and intense, as I would explain society's role in tortures such as I witness all around me every day. I have been thwarted in devious gambits by those who have something even worse than the strait-jacket as we have seen Drs Breggin and Cohen describe in 'Science'. They call it (appropriately) 'pharmacological lobotomies'. ECT, face painting ideas for children
, is even more disgusting and joins Ritalin in a campaign which social forces, face painting ideas for children
, are developing in this control paradigm. It seems relevant to point out enough of the matter of my experience so that you will know you are getting it pretty close to what they say when they use the phrase 'the horse's mouth'.
Even the pharmacological and psychiatric conglomerate acknowledges the physical elements of depression. Some are cluing in to nutrition and massage or simple caring. The effects of education and alienation are massive, but bad parenting and the lack of enabling nutritive support in early life establish character and behavior traits that stubbornly resist real therapeutic methods. These obsessions often are far too time-consuming for high-paid 'professionals', face painting ideas for children
, to offer assistance - so we just drug and deceive! This medical model as some call it makes a great deal of money and keeps the public at large thinking something humane is going on in the life of the care-givers and victims of a society without true spiritual awareness and far too little compassion. The buzz words and catchy phrases like 'informed consent' are not anything more than deceit, as they still give lobotomies. In one case they did it without informing the person who just died in 2005.
Francis Mark Mondimore writes a book called 'Depression,, face painting ideas for children
, The Mood Disease' updated in 1993 by Johns Hopkins University that presents the lies of this machine that Ivan Illich (in 'Limits To Medicine') identified as 'mechanistic and over-professionalized' in the mid 70s.Here is the overstatement of the century from its inside flap:
"The revised 'Depression, the Mood Disease' tells readers exactly what they need to know about the causes, symptoms, and treatment of depression:
*How antidepressant drugs were discovered, how they work, and with what side effects. {I'm biting my tongue!}
*What, face painting ideas for children
, Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) and panic attacks are, and how they are treated.
*How electro-convulsive therapy has changed for the better--and why it now works for up to 90% of those treated. {And all the professions involved in continuing to provide this fearsome horror that is necessary, face painting ideas for children
, to repeat as it continues frying brain cells. Now randomly due to a drug cocktail, so that people's libido and zest is burned out too.}
*How the special problems of depression in children and, face painting ideas for children
, older persons are handled. *How to deal with a depressed friend or family member.
*How such disorders as hormonal imbalance and even lead poisoning can 'mimic' the symptoms of depression.
*Why depression is sometimes misdiagnosed as 'PMS', drug abuse, or Alzheimer's disease..." (2)
The future holds promises and terrors galore in the application of 'easy' answers like drugs developed for specific genetic make-ups and nanites to monitor and deliver targeted drugs or shocks to the system in order to make us behave as we should. The ever-increasing 'big brother' that allows the growth industries associated with the management of people will lead to full employment if we allow it to continue down the current path. There will only be one benefit as the unemployable grow in number and the employment roles show, face painting ideas for children
, full employment. The statistics will show the economy is productive and there is little unemployment or reason to worry about an economic depression. That is the end of the excerpt from my encyclopedia. I will be including some other more recent writings as we proceed.
I had returned from the Caribbean and a failed business experience in Mexico and Belize in the month of March 1998. My last wife and I had purchased a yacht, which we hoped to be able to build a party boat/tourist business around. My wife had named the boat 'Champagne Dreams' after the motto of Robin Leach's show 'The Rich and the Famous'. It was her idea that we put a Jacuzzi on the front deck, of this 47 foot fiberglass yacht that we purchased in Fort Lauderdale, and our partner (Captain Crunch) Jerry had taken with me to Cancun. His nickname had not been established until we were leaving Key West. He destroyed the fueling station of the marina while hitting three other boats. We were still married though it was never a real marriage as most people think of it. The relationship was already complicated with another man named David.
It is not the purpose of this book to try to describe the trials and tribulations of a relationship between myself and a young Vietnamese exotic dancer who had been one of the 'boat 'people'. Suffice it to say there were many exciting times that had lead me to the point where I was ready to leave this world before I even met her. I had been a self-made millionaire at the age of thirty. My travels and business had allowed me to meet some of the most interesting people. By any standard of measurement most would agree I had enjoyed life FULLY. My interest in psychology due to having grown up with a schizophrenic mother had long before gotten into the realm of Eastern mysticism and parapsychology.
My wife was just twenty-two and I was forty six years old. We had gone to Cancun in early September of 1997 to further research a stele that I had found at Chichen Itza four years before with my previous wife. This event had ended with my being thrown off the site, and having to sign a document giving the Mexican authorities the right to, face painting ideas for children
, throw me in a Mexican prison, without any recourse to the courts and Canadian law. This is truly a story of oppression of the Mayan and native people of Central America that includes a deceit of history which is IMMENSE! We had been doing a non-invasive charcoal rubbing of this 'stele' (stone for heavenly worship, or library in stone). It had been painted over twice and it seemed the white surface, face painting ideas for children
, would have made the pictures provide insufficient clarity. So we had some paper we were using over the stone to capture the alphabet that had not 'come out' in the previous photos I had taken four years earlier when the granite 'rock' had its original shiny surface.
This alphabet I believe confirms the work of Col. Churchward,, face painting ideas for children
, the author of 'The Lost Continent of Mu', who documents the Cara-Maya language is the translational medium through which the Greek alphabet on the other side of the 'stele' tells the story of the destruction of the civilization that originally colonized South America some sixty thousand years earlier. I believe Col. Churchward would agree with my statement, face painting ideas for children
, that the original colonization had started during the Riis-Wurm geologic Ice Age, and was finalized during the last Ice Age; if he had the benefit of recent geologic and archaeologic evidence. A fellow researcher and good friend named Brenda found this in Islam and Sufism which applies to my personal quest.
Dear Brenda:
Was this the result of Jeffrey mentioning the Language of the Birds is the Language of the Bards and the alchemist (like this person) Fulcanelli? This whole thing is very much from the Keltic Creed. I draw attention to these parts - "The Hoopoe says that it is better to lose your life than to languish miserably. The Hoopoe says,
So long as we do not die to ourselves, and so long as we identify with someone or something, we shall never be free. The spiritual way is not for those wrapped up in exterior life.5
You will enjoy happiness if you succeed in withdrawing from attachment to the world. Whoever is merciful even to the merciless is favored by the compassionate. It is better to agree to differ than to quarrel. The Hoopoe warns the sixth bird against the dog of desire that runs ahead. Each vain desire becomes a demon, and yielding to each one begets a hundred others. The world is a prison under the devil, and one should have no truck with its master. The Hoopoe also says that if you let no one benefit from your gold, you will not profit either; but by the smallest gift to the poor you both benefit. She says,
Good fortune will come to you only as you give. If you cannot renounce life completely, you can at least free, face painting ideas for children
, yourself from the love of riches and honors.6
A pupil becomes afraid in facing a choice between two roads, but a shaikh advises getting rid of fear so that either road will be good. The Hoopoe tells the eighth bird that only, face painting ideas for children
, if death ceases to exercise power over creatures would it be wise to remain content in a golden palace." (3)
The 'experts' have tried to evaluate me as a sufferer of this but found no such evidence or behavior. The same was true for all other mental or medical conditions, so they think 'witch' covers my condition in life; because I refuse to participate in the materially managed environment any more. We will not explore the horrors of the current forms of Inquisition in great detail in this book as it relates to me...
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Hypnosis and the Treatment of the Agoraphobic Eleven
Author: Michael Hadfield
Source: articleage.com
Agoraphobia: fear of the market place.
…not, as many people imagine, a fear of open spaces.
There are no phobias that are fun to have, but agoraphobia is one of the worst, simply because it's almost impossible to avoid the object of fear on a day to day basis. This is because the object of fear is Life itself. Fear of Life manifested as a fear of social encounters; a fear of being trapped; a fear of feeling, face painting designs , foolish; a fear of looking foolish; fear of humiliation…
Another deadly aspect of agoraphobia is the speed with which it develops to the point, face painting designs , of the sufferer being afraid to leave the house alone. Often its onset is started by a panic attack - in itself frightening enough, without this possible consequence. The closing in, face painting designs , of a personal world within a matter of weeks is a terrifying experience, and one that friends and relatives find almost impossible to understand and to cope with.
I have observed eleven factors that are frequently present with agoraphobia:
1. Low self-esteem
2. Lack of interest in job
3. Lack of a creative outlet
4. Insecurity
5. Lack of individuation
6. Insecurity in Relationship
7. Strong dependence
8. Fear of the cure
9. Nothing to live for
10. Lack of play/fun
11. Lack of regular exercise
Addressing these items under hypnosis and working towards bringing about change in The Eleven is the key to releasing, face painting designs , the imprisoning fear.
Low Self-Esteem.
Self-esteem has turned into a bit of a buzzword these days. However, from an agoraphobic's perspective it is something that needs to be discussed. And for the purposes of this discussion it's going to mean: how important you think you are in relation to others.
Now, if you think you are about as important as a worm (I'm a gardener so I, along with Charles Darwin, happen to think that worms are hugely important), you're not going to want to mix with anyone else, because they'll be able to see how unimportant you are. You can see it, so it's got to be clear to everyone else. This alone is a good reason to avoid others. But I'd like to point out that just because you can see it doesn't mean everyone else can. You can see your dreams - but no one else can!
Everyone wants to feel important. From a Mum getting a spontaneous hug from her child, or a thank you for a well-cooked meal, to a degree ceremony with a huge audience - we all like to have at least someone recognise and honour our worth. Consequently we will avoid circumstances that make us feel unimportant. If we feel less important than everyone, then we will avoid everyone. If we need an excuse, because our avoidance behaviour itself is socially unacceptable, then our wonderful, self-protective subconscious mind will come up with a solution - it might even, face painting designs , create a socially acceptable (i.e. medically identifiable) health problem.
Lack of Job Interest.
In my experience most people don't enjoy their livelihoods. To the majority what they do is ok, but not what they would do if they had a free choice. And at the lower wage end of the employment world, work is seen largely as drudgery - something necessary in order to pay the bills and just survive until it's time to draw a pittance of a pension, or until life is over.
Work is often a trap. An individual somehow ending up doing what they do without knowing quite how it happened,, it pays well, they used to like it, now they don't, but as the salary increased the lifestyle improved with it and the financial outgoings increased to keep pace until life is lived in a certain amount of luxury. So the job is tolerated, but the pressure and stress increase because the financial pressure is too strong to give it up and do something fun for a lower salary. Again you are trapped trying to survive; probably at this point with a spouse and children who would not be pleased were you to substantially reduce their affluent life-style.
Lack of Creative Outlet.
This I have identified as a key element in psychological problems, face painting designs , . Changing just this one aspect of life brings about profound changes in all the other aspects without doing anything else. We are, each of us wonderful creative beings, face painting, face painting designs , designs , . Each one of us has a mind that is beautifully and wonderfully imaginative. But what happens is that we are frequently taught that our creations are not good enough. I see this reflected in the eyes of so many who come to see me for help. Let me give you an example from my own childhood - Art. My drawing, face painting designs , skills are still around the level of a five year, face painting designs , old, they never developed beyond that. I remember many hours, right up until age 15, in art classes. But I was rubbish. I have identified two problems. Lack of encouragement, face painting designs , and lack of teaching. I never once in all those years of art classes saw a teacher demonstrate a technique, show, face painting designs , anyone how they could improve their work, or give a word of praise to anyone whose work wasn't already high quality. All art teachers did was to state what was to be drawn/painted, and then select the most 'life-like' to go on the wall.
This lack of encouragement for demonstrating our unique view of the world; the lack of praise for an effort that is the very best we could produce given our personal skills abilities, and eyesight; the lack of being lovingly shown, without criticism for what we've already achieved, a better way to achieve what WE want to achieve, rather than what someone else wants us to achieve; is the source of much pain and failure in later life.
I've since discovered that with the right teacher anyone who wants to enough can be an artist at an acceptable level. And the right teacher is one who demolishes the barriers to success that we carry within. The right teacher is one who knows that we can do what we want to do, but we are afraid to do it. The right teacher allows, praises, and encourages pure expression of self.
Creativity isn't just about art. Art is just an example. Cooking a meal with love and arranging it beautifully, face painting designs , on the plate is a work of creativity. Planning or planting a garden or a window box is a creative act. Walking down the road and daydreaming is a creative act. Starting a business is a creative act. Putting together a, face painting designs , jigsaw, or solving a crossword puzzle are creative acts. Writing an article for an ezine, or designing a web page, are creative activities. Creativity is putting you out into the world and changing that world, making that world different, either in your dreams or for real. Your creativity doesn't have to be better than anyone else's. It just needs to express, face painting designs , YOU.
If you do nothing else after reading this, add a few moments of creativity to your world every day.
Insecurity.
This shows up as a lack of feeling safe in your world. It can manifest as an unhealthy obedience to, and fear of, authority figures - like parents, teachers, employers, and supervisors. It can show itself as an inability to say 'no' when you really want to say 'no' but you feel guilty about letting someone down, or think that because someone asks you have to say 'yes', because they will think badly of you or stop liking you if you say 'no'. In truth if you start to say 'no', face painting designs , when you want to, you will find that people like you more because they value your honesty, and they know that when you say yes you really mean it and are a genuinely willing participant.
Lack of Individuation.
This is a nice way of saying you never really grew up. But telling someone they, face painting designs , haven't grown up can be perceived as an insult. What this means is that you may well have had over-protective parents who were fearful of your safety, and in your best interests they prevented you from taking those risks - like getting lost, falling out of a tree,, face painting designs , exploring a graveyard at night, staying out a little later than was safe - that children actually need to take in order to discover that although their, face painting designs , world can be a frightening place at times, they need to experience those fears AND discover that they can survive them and be whole and alive and ok. You even need to fail publicly as a child and feel embarrassed and learn that this too is a survivable event. This is what I mean by 'growing up'. I have to admit that falling out of a tree, as an adult, is a lot more physically risky than doing it as a child. And if you've already arrived at severe agoraphobia then the graveyard at night time is probably a no-no. So go back to creativity and just imagine yourself doing those things, face painting designs , that were forbidden as too risky, even though all your friends were doing them and you just ended up feeling isolated and alone. Imagine how your world might be different now, if you'd done those things then.
Insecurity In Relationships.
You know you're with the wrong partner, you know the relationship you're in isn't working, yet you are terrified of being alone. You aren't loveable, so you'd better put up with what you get, because if you give this up, there won't be anyone else and you'll spend the rest of your life alone and die all, face painting designs , alone.
This is what the fear says. And while you believe what it says it's perfectly true. You will be alone if you give up what you've got. Not because you aren't loveable, but because you believe it. Beliefs aren't truths. But if you believe you aren't loveable that's what the world will see, someone who doesn't love themselves. And if you can't love yourself no one else will. But you might be seen as vulnerable and consequently find yourself being used when you thought you were being loved.
Seems a bit harsh that, but agoraphobia is what you do to yourself when your world becomes so intolerable that you'll go insane if you don't find a way to escape from it. And that's exactly what your subconscious mind does, without your permission; it creates a way for you to escape. What it creates isn't pleasant, but it means you don't have to face anyone who might see the truth of you - that you aren't loveable, or clever, or artistic, or have any value whatsoever.
Dependence.
In a loving relationship with a caring partner,, face painting designs , there is often an unhealthy dependence. This is frequently because of the partner's need to be needed. This is the most difficult aspect I face treating this problem, because the partner's need to be needed resists, and occasionally even sabotages, the changes that I'm trying to bring about.
This problem is again born from your childhood if you were raised with:
- Parents who, because of their own beliefs about what was in your best interests, failed to ensure that you experienced, face painting designs , the world in safe ways - on your own.
- An early life that didn't provide you with challenges to overcome.
- Parent's, teachers, significant adults who found it difficult to watch, face painting designs , you fail (and learn) and gave constant correction or took over when a task wasn't being completed fast enough or accurately enough.
- Adults, face painting designs , who were over-critical, creating this feeling of inadequacy that leaves you with a sense of 'I can't do it on my own' I need you there 'just in case…'
Fear of the Cure.
At the end of the day, if you want to be free of this problem, you know that you will be able to go out whenever and wherever you want. You will have to go out alone. You will have to go shopping in supermarkets, go to theatres, travel in trains and planes. You will have to make decisions and choices for yourself. You will have to do things that others may look at and judge unfavourably.
Right now, in the safety of the fear, all of those things seem horrific and just thinking about them will produce an intense anxiety re-action simply because you can't see how you can get from where you are to where you want to be without lots of pain. So it's probably safer to stay where you are.
Nothing to Live For.
If there is no interest in life, no fascination for the world, or an aspect of it, no joy, or pleasure; if every morning when you wake, your waking thought is 'Oh no! How will I get through today.'; if every moment of that day is longing for nighttime and the oblivion of sleep; then you will experience no drive to be well, face painting designs , . If you want to change, if you want to be free of this incapacitating fear that is destroying your life, then you have to want freedom. You have to want it, face painting designs , more than you want to stay in bed. You have to want it more than you want to sleep.
Lack of Play/Fun.
What do, face painting designs , young children do more than anything else - play. They turn everything into a game as long as they are contented. What don't adults get much of? Play. You need to play. You need to be playful in your approach to life. Life can be serious all on its own. It doesn't need your help. You can have fun and it won't mind. When was the last time you had a good laugh? When was the last time you knocked a ball around without trying to win or beat anyone? When was the last time you flew a, face painting designs , kite without needing to have a bigger/better/faster/more colourful kite than everyone else? When was the last time you made a mud pie? When was the last time you wore a funny hat?
Lack of Regular Exercise.
Lack of regular exercise - for obvious reasons is also a factor of significance. Exercise releases endorphins, which raise your mood state. It lets your body know you care about it and a sense of routine is always important to the healing of any psychological illness.
Healing, face painting designs , with Hypnosis.
Hypnosis is wonderful because it can make the healing process easier. It can make the healing process easier without losing sight of the fact that at the end of the day you are going to be doing what terrifies you right now. Because with hypnosis it's all in the mind. Your fear is all in your mind. Your fear arises out of your thoughts and your thoughts arise from your beliefs and ideas, face painting designs , about you and your world. Your fear comes from your deep subconscious mind and this is the area that hypnosis can impact. You are still going to have to walk out, face painting designs , of the door on your own one day, and you, face painting designs , may still, face painting designs , feel a little anxious, but you'll do it and feel good about having succeeded and each success will build on the next and the next until you look back on this period, face painting designs , of your life as an interesting excursion into the Shadow energies within your mind.
A course of treatment for agoraphobia, with a hypnotherapist, should deal hypnotically with each of the areas that I've addressed. Because without bringing about change to the underlying, face painting designs , causes, you haven't affected a cure, you've just treated the symptoms - the way many drugs do. And the problem, face painting designs , will re-emerge at some point; maybe in a different form such as a physical illness.
None of the problem areas that I've highlighted can prevent, face painting designs , you from getting better if you really want to get better and are willing to do what is necessary to get better. This might mean taking a risk like going on your own to visit a good hypnotherapist. And even if you can't do that initially and need to start with home visits, it would be a goal to hold in mind.
Whatever is going on for you is going on because your subconscious mind believes it to be in your best interest. With hypnosis we gain direct access to the subconscious and can suggest that what it, face painting designs , is doing is actually not as helpful as it thinks it is and that we wish to enlist, face painting designs , its support in bringing about change.
Curing agoraphobia is not a rapid process. It takes many hypnosis sessions and progress is slow - but easy. It is slow because, face painting designs , with each change you have to, face painting designs , re-adapt and become comfortable with that change in order to be ready for the next. Each step is a small one so there is never any sense of being overwhelmed. This is why we don't focus on the end result because that's too frightening. We focus on today and what, face painting designs , we can change today in line with experiencing a freedom for the future. During, face painting designs , treatment you are in control. One of the problems with agoraphobia is a fear of loss of control. You control the pace of improvement to one that you are comfortable with.
Hypnosis isn't a magic wand that will make everything go away in a flash. But it is a magic wand that makes the process of healing gentle and caring and never takes away your sense of achievement at having accomplished the shift from hiding away at home to being free and comfortable and confident out in the world.
Michael J. Hadfield MBSCH is a registered clinical hypnotherapist. You can experience his unique style on a popular range of hypnosis CD's and tapes at http://www.hypnosisiseasy.com. Here you can also obtain treatment for a variety of problems and explore his approach to health, healing, and hypnosis.
Source: articleage.com
Agoraphobia: fear of the market place.
…not, as many people imagine, a fear of open spaces.
There are no phobias that are fun to have, but agoraphobia is one of the worst, simply because it's almost impossible to avoid the object of fear on a day to day basis. This is because the object of fear is Life itself. Fear of Life manifested as a fear of social encounters; a fear of being trapped; a fear of feeling, face painting designs , foolish; a fear of looking foolish; fear of humiliation…
Another deadly aspect of agoraphobia is the speed with which it develops to the point, face painting designs , of the sufferer being afraid to leave the house alone. Often its onset is started by a panic attack - in itself frightening enough, without this possible consequence. The closing in, face painting designs , of a personal world within a matter of weeks is a terrifying experience, and one that friends and relatives find almost impossible to understand and to cope with.
I have observed eleven factors that are frequently present with agoraphobia:
1. Low self-esteem
2. Lack of interest in job
3. Lack of a creative outlet
4. Insecurity
5. Lack of individuation
6. Insecurity in Relationship
7. Strong dependence
8. Fear of the cure
9. Nothing to live for
10. Lack of play/fun
11. Lack of regular exercise
Addressing these items under hypnosis and working towards bringing about change in The Eleven is the key to releasing, face painting designs , the imprisoning fear.
Low Self-Esteem.
Self-esteem has turned into a bit of a buzzword these days. However, from an agoraphobic's perspective it is something that needs to be discussed. And for the purposes of this discussion it's going to mean: how important you think you are in relation to others.
Now, if you think you are about as important as a worm (I'm a gardener so I, along with Charles Darwin, happen to think that worms are hugely important), you're not going to want to mix with anyone else, because they'll be able to see how unimportant you are. You can see it, so it's got to be clear to everyone else. This alone is a good reason to avoid others. But I'd like to point out that just because you can see it doesn't mean everyone else can. You can see your dreams - but no one else can!
Everyone wants to feel important. From a Mum getting a spontaneous hug from her child, or a thank you for a well-cooked meal, to a degree ceremony with a huge audience - we all like to have at least someone recognise and honour our worth. Consequently we will avoid circumstances that make us feel unimportant. If we feel less important than everyone, then we will avoid everyone. If we need an excuse, because our avoidance behaviour itself is socially unacceptable, then our wonderful, self-protective subconscious mind will come up with a solution - it might even, face painting designs , create a socially acceptable (i.e. medically identifiable) health problem.
Lack of Job Interest.
In my experience most people don't enjoy their livelihoods. To the majority what they do is ok, but not what they would do if they had a free choice. And at the lower wage end of the employment world, work is seen largely as drudgery - something necessary in order to pay the bills and just survive until it's time to draw a pittance of a pension, or until life is over.
Work is often a trap. An individual somehow ending up doing what they do without knowing quite how it happened,, it pays well, they used to like it, now they don't, but as the salary increased the lifestyle improved with it and the financial outgoings increased to keep pace until life is lived in a certain amount of luxury. So the job is tolerated, but the pressure and stress increase because the financial pressure is too strong to give it up and do something fun for a lower salary. Again you are trapped trying to survive; probably at this point with a spouse and children who would not be pleased were you to substantially reduce their affluent life-style.
Lack of Creative Outlet.
This I have identified as a key element in psychological problems, face painting designs , . Changing just this one aspect of life brings about profound changes in all the other aspects without doing anything else. We are, each of us wonderful creative beings, face painting, face painting designs , designs , . Each one of us has a mind that is beautifully and wonderfully imaginative. But what happens is that we are frequently taught that our creations are not good enough. I see this reflected in the eyes of so many who come to see me for help. Let me give you an example from my own childhood - Art. My drawing, face painting designs , skills are still around the level of a five year, face painting designs , old, they never developed beyond that. I remember many hours, right up until age 15, in art classes. But I was rubbish. I have identified two problems. Lack of encouragement, face painting designs , and lack of teaching. I never once in all those years of art classes saw a teacher demonstrate a technique, show, face painting designs , anyone how they could improve their work, or give a word of praise to anyone whose work wasn't already high quality. All art teachers did was to state what was to be drawn/painted, and then select the most 'life-like' to go on the wall.
This lack of encouragement for demonstrating our unique view of the world; the lack of praise for an effort that is the very best we could produce given our personal skills abilities, and eyesight; the lack of being lovingly shown, without criticism for what we've already achieved, a better way to achieve what WE want to achieve, rather than what someone else wants us to achieve; is the source of much pain and failure in later life.
I've since discovered that with the right teacher anyone who wants to enough can be an artist at an acceptable level. And the right teacher is one who demolishes the barriers to success that we carry within. The right teacher is one who knows that we can do what we want to do, but we are afraid to do it. The right teacher allows, praises, and encourages pure expression of self.
Creativity isn't just about art. Art is just an example. Cooking a meal with love and arranging it beautifully, face painting designs , on the plate is a work of creativity. Planning or planting a garden or a window box is a creative act. Walking down the road and daydreaming is a creative act. Starting a business is a creative act. Putting together a, face painting designs , jigsaw, or solving a crossword puzzle are creative acts. Writing an article for an ezine, or designing a web page, are creative activities. Creativity is putting you out into the world and changing that world, making that world different, either in your dreams or for real. Your creativity doesn't have to be better than anyone else's. It just needs to express, face painting designs , YOU.
If you do nothing else after reading this, add a few moments of creativity to your world every day.
Insecurity.
This shows up as a lack of feeling safe in your world. It can manifest as an unhealthy obedience to, and fear of, authority figures - like parents, teachers, employers, and supervisors. It can show itself as an inability to say 'no' when you really want to say 'no' but you feel guilty about letting someone down, or think that because someone asks you have to say 'yes', because they will think badly of you or stop liking you if you say 'no'. In truth if you start to say 'no', face painting designs , when you want to, you will find that people like you more because they value your honesty, and they know that when you say yes you really mean it and are a genuinely willing participant.
Lack of Individuation.
This is a nice way of saying you never really grew up. But telling someone they, face painting designs , haven't grown up can be perceived as an insult. What this means is that you may well have had over-protective parents who were fearful of your safety, and in your best interests they prevented you from taking those risks - like getting lost, falling out of a tree,, face painting designs , exploring a graveyard at night, staying out a little later than was safe - that children actually need to take in order to discover that although their, face painting designs , world can be a frightening place at times, they need to experience those fears AND discover that they can survive them and be whole and alive and ok. You even need to fail publicly as a child and feel embarrassed and learn that this too is a survivable event. This is what I mean by 'growing up'. I have to admit that falling out of a tree, as an adult, is a lot more physically risky than doing it as a child. And if you've already arrived at severe agoraphobia then the graveyard at night time is probably a no-no. So go back to creativity and just imagine yourself doing those things, face painting designs , that were forbidden as too risky, even though all your friends were doing them and you just ended up feeling isolated and alone. Imagine how your world might be different now, if you'd done those things then.
Insecurity In Relationships.
You know you're with the wrong partner, you know the relationship you're in isn't working, yet you are terrified of being alone. You aren't loveable, so you'd better put up with what you get, because if you give this up, there won't be anyone else and you'll spend the rest of your life alone and die all, face painting designs , alone.
This is what the fear says. And while you believe what it says it's perfectly true. You will be alone if you give up what you've got. Not because you aren't loveable, but because you believe it. Beliefs aren't truths. But if you believe you aren't loveable that's what the world will see, someone who doesn't love themselves. And if you can't love yourself no one else will. But you might be seen as vulnerable and consequently find yourself being used when you thought you were being loved.
Seems a bit harsh that, but agoraphobia is what you do to yourself when your world becomes so intolerable that you'll go insane if you don't find a way to escape from it. And that's exactly what your subconscious mind does, without your permission; it creates a way for you to escape. What it creates isn't pleasant, but it means you don't have to face anyone who might see the truth of you - that you aren't loveable, or clever, or artistic, or have any value whatsoever.
Dependence.
In a loving relationship with a caring partner,, face painting designs , there is often an unhealthy dependence. This is frequently because of the partner's need to be needed. This is the most difficult aspect I face treating this problem, because the partner's need to be needed resists, and occasionally even sabotages, the changes that I'm trying to bring about.
This problem is again born from your childhood if you were raised with:
- Parents who, because of their own beliefs about what was in your best interests, failed to ensure that you experienced, face painting designs , the world in safe ways - on your own.
- An early life that didn't provide you with challenges to overcome.
- Parent's, teachers, significant adults who found it difficult to watch, face painting designs , you fail (and learn) and gave constant correction or took over when a task wasn't being completed fast enough or accurately enough.
- Adults, face painting designs , who were over-critical, creating this feeling of inadequacy that leaves you with a sense of 'I can't do it on my own' I need you there 'just in case…'
Fear of the Cure.
At the end of the day, if you want to be free of this problem, you know that you will be able to go out whenever and wherever you want. You will have to go out alone. You will have to go shopping in supermarkets, go to theatres, travel in trains and planes. You will have to make decisions and choices for yourself. You will have to do things that others may look at and judge unfavourably.
Right now, in the safety of the fear, all of those things seem horrific and just thinking about them will produce an intense anxiety re-action simply because you can't see how you can get from where you are to where you want to be without lots of pain. So it's probably safer to stay where you are.
Nothing to Live For.
If there is no interest in life, no fascination for the world, or an aspect of it, no joy, or pleasure; if every morning when you wake, your waking thought is 'Oh no! How will I get through today.'; if every moment of that day is longing for nighttime and the oblivion of sleep; then you will experience no drive to be well, face painting designs , . If you want to change, if you want to be free of this incapacitating fear that is destroying your life, then you have to want freedom. You have to want it, face painting designs , more than you want to stay in bed. You have to want it more than you want to sleep.
Lack of Play/Fun.
What do, face painting designs , young children do more than anything else - play. They turn everything into a game as long as they are contented. What don't adults get much of? Play. You need to play. You need to be playful in your approach to life. Life can be serious all on its own. It doesn't need your help. You can have fun and it won't mind. When was the last time you had a good laugh? When was the last time you knocked a ball around without trying to win or beat anyone? When was the last time you flew a, face painting designs , kite without needing to have a bigger/better/faster/more colourful kite than everyone else? When was the last time you made a mud pie? When was the last time you wore a funny hat?
Lack of Regular Exercise.
Lack of regular exercise - for obvious reasons is also a factor of significance. Exercise releases endorphins, which raise your mood state. It lets your body know you care about it and a sense of routine is always important to the healing of any psychological illness.
Healing, face painting designs , with Hypnosis.
Hypnosis is wonderful because it can make the healing process easier. It can make the healing process easier without losing sight of the fact that at the end of the day you are going to be doing what terrifies you right now. Because with hypnosis it's all in the mind. Your fear is all in your mind. Your fear arises out of your thoughts and your thoughts arise from your beliefs and ideas, face painting designs , about you and your world. Your fear comes from your deep subconscious mind and this is the area that hypnosis can impact. You are still going to have to walk out, face painting designs , of the door on your own one day, and you, face painting designs , may still, face painting designs , feel a little anxious, but you'll do it and feel good about having succeeded and each success will build on the next and the next until you look back on this period, face painting designs , of your life as an interesting excursion into the Shadow energies within your mind.
A course of treatment for agoraphobia, with a hypnotherapist, should deal hypnotically with each of the areas that I've addressed. Because without bringing about change to the underlying, face painting designs , causes, you haven't affected a cure, you've just treated the symptoms - the way many drugs do. And the problem, face painting designs , will re-emerge at some point; maybe in a different form such as a physical illness.
None of the problem areas that I've highlighted can prevent, face painting designs , you from getting better if you really want to get better and are willing to do what is necessary to get better. This might mean taking a risk like going on your own to visit a good hypnotherapist. And even if you can't do that initially and need to start with home visits, it would be a goal to hold in mind.
Whatever is going on for you is going on because your subconscious mind believes it to be in your best interest. With hypnosis we gain direct access to the subconscious and can suggest that what it, face painting designs , is doing is actually not as helpful as it thinks it is and that we wish to enlist, face painting designs , its support in bringing about change.
Curing agoraphobia is not a rapid process. It takes many hypnosis sessions and progress is slow - but easy. It is slow because, face painting designs , with each change you have to, face painting designs , re-adapt and become comfortable with that change in order to be ready for the next. Each step is a small one so there is never any sense of being overwhelmed. This is why we don't focus on the end result because that's too frightening. We focus on today and what, face painting designs , we can change today in line with experiencing a freedom for the future. During, face painting designs , treatment you are in control. One of the problems with agoraphobia is a fear of loss of control. You control the pace of improvement to one that you are comfortable with.
Hypnosis isn't a magic wand that will make everything go away in a flash. But it is a magic wand that makes the process of healing gentle and caring and never takes away your sense of achievement at having accomplished the shift from hiding away at home to being free and comfortable and confident out in the world.
Michael J. Hadfield MBSCH is a registered clinical hypnotherapist. You can experience his unique style on a popular range of hypnosis CD's and tapes at http://www.hypnosisiseasy.com. Here you can also obtain treatment for a variety of problems and explore his approach to health, healing, and hypnosis.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
The Joys of Being Healthy
Author: Kay Kopit
Source: articleage.com
It is amazing to be able to say I am a whole, happy, healthy, loving woman. I was sick for the first 40 years of my life. Like millions of other human beings I grew up immersed in the family disease of alcoholism. For generations it has plagued, face painting pictures , my family. The unbalanced life I led is so common in our society;, face painting pictures , I didnt know anything was wrong. I was a participant in the chaos, confusion, neuroses, pain and suffering which is present in dysfunctional families. I call it The Dance of Death.
I grew up in St. Louis, Missouri in the community of Clayton. The only memories I have of my father are when he would beat my brother and me with his belt so severely my clothes would cling to the bloody strap marks on my legs. He would make us wait for our punishment in our room, face painting pictures , before he dealt the ugly blows. My mother closed her eyes to what was happening. Both of them partied on weekends where I would find empty highball glasses scattered all over the living room. I had holes in th e soles of my shoes while my mother would model a new diamond cocktail ring, winnings from a weekly poker game. My dad was also a compulsive gambler. He died at the age of 45 when I was nine years old.
My mother attracted another alcoholic to her life soon, face painting pictures , after my fathers death. They had a symbiotic, codependent and addictive relationship. Every ten days they would consume a case of scotch which was delivered to our apartment from the local liquor store. My mother never, face painting pictures , appeared drunk but she was distant, selfish and narcissistic. My step fathers disease had progressed to the point he was visibly inebriated most evenings. His attitude was condescending, nasty and self righteous. He was verbally abusive and drove his car while intoxicated on many occasions. When I think back to that period of my history I remember keeping my, face painting pictures , personal, face painting pictures , life secret!!! I was ashamed of their behavior. I pretended all was well and I began developing neurotic habits for self preservation.
In my teens I danced several days after school, participated in theater groups, worked in a department store and had creative life in my head. I imagined the way I wanted my world to be and was in denial as to the truth in front of me. I became obsessive, compulsive and an over achiever. Because I worked so hard I accomplished a lot for a young girl but the reality was it was inspired by fear, insecurity and a need for control.
In college I devoted myself to art and earned a B.S. in Education and a M.A. in Painting and Ceramics from the University of Missouri. I was hired as a college instructor soon after graduate school. I felt happy for a time because I was away from home and involved in teaching. I took my job very seriously but the loneliness I felt when I was by myself was debilitating.
I longed for, face painting pictures , love . . . any kind. I didnt realize it at the time but I had never felt affection. I became preoccupied with thoughts of men. I had guys on my mind constantly! I was popular and had many choices but I picked the ones who I thought needed me. Most often they were from dysfunctional families. I dated a lot of drunks during my 20s. It felt familiar. In spite of my success as an artist and a teacher, I had low self esteem and I knew something was wrong with me.
In l969 I began a new life in another city. Within a week of, face painting pictures , moving to Boston, Massachusetts, I was brutally raped and hospitalized. I never received, face painting pictures , help with this trauma and didnt properly grieve until years later. I pushed down the pain and was then, more than ever, resolved to create the perfect life for myself, (as if it were in my hands?)
This, face painting pictures , was made easy for me when Joey Haudel entered my life. He filled the position of my Knight in Shining Armour, albeit, distorted. He was young, handsome, and alcoholic and had just been released from prison. We needed each other like ducks need water. We bonded in a codependent relationship that lasted 12 years.
Our experiences together, face painting pictures , were astounding. What I learned about myself was profound. Our journey is almost unbelievable. I have told this story in a dramatic narrative, I Survived: One Womans Journey of Self Healing and Transformation on DVD. It is filled with the dark world of illness and moves to the light of wellness. I reached my bottom after years of suffering. I was contemplating suicide but was saved by the Grace of God and the dear voice of a telephone operator who kept me on the phone for over an hour.
I spent years in recovery; beginning with Al-Anon meetings in 1973, several series of Adult Children of Alcoholic Therapy Sessions, individual therapy with numerous therapists and devouring self help books. I had the courage to look within and face the demons. It wasnt easy and many times I wanted to quit. I often felt I was too depressed to get well. One step at a time I forged ahead and never looked back! I visualized a healthy prognosis. Today I am living that beautiful picture!
I am happily married to a man 19 years my junior, face painting pictures , . What makes our relationship extraordinary is that my husband was born in 1960 the year after I graduated, face painting pictures , from high school. I am older than his mother. We recently celebrated our 17th anniversary and continue to share, face painting pictures , the most fabulous life. The secret of our success is our deeply committed love for one another. We enjoy a passionate romance. I wish what Bryan and I have could be sprinkled, face painting pictures , over the world like angel dust.
We met in 1985 during a rainy winter in San Francisco. , face painting pictures , We were neighbors on a tiny street near the historic Mission Dolores. The worst storm of the season was on its way and my roof was leaking profusely. I was in dire straits financially, having been newly divorced. I was preparing to fix it myself. Unfortunately my ladder wasnt tall enough. I needed help. None of the folks I knew were home that Saturday morning but I noticed an open door directly across from my house. I hurried upstairs to the second story flat in the azure painted duplex and walked down the long corridor to the living room. There on the sofa was a guy watching the football game on T.V. I introduced myself and then proceeded to ask for his assistance. He looked at me like I was nuts. The silence was deafening. How often does a stranger enter your apartment with a request for help with a major repair?, face painting pictures , I was flushed, face painting pictures , with embarrassment but was in, face painting pictures , too deep to recover. Fortunately he agreed to help me.
This uncommon beginning signaled the magic that lay before us. The sparks flew. We went on our first date within days of this meeting. Bryans car was broken so we took the bus across the city to an authentic Moroccan restaurant where we sat on paisley cushions and ate with our fingers. I remember clearly how primitive this felt and how natural it was to be with him. He didnt seem the least bit concerned about my age. I, on the other hand, was more sensitive. I was still healing from the codependent relationship of 12 years and had never experienced, face painting pictures , true intimacy. I wasnt sure it was the proper thing to do but I couldnt help myself; I was falling in love. I was scared because these, face painting pictures , feelings were coming so quickly.
Bryan moved in with me within weeks of our first meeting. I remember, face painting pictures , thinking if it didnt work out it would be easy to ask him to leave because all he owned was a T.V. For Valentines Day he created a hanging wire mobile in the shape of intertwined hearts and presented it to me with flowers and chocolate. This type of thoughtful gesture is typical of Bryan. He has never missed a special occasion and has often surprised me with jewelry when he returns from a business trip.
One evening in the spring we were waiting to board a dinner train in Mendocino. A drunken man approached us and said, How come you two are dressed up? Are you getting married? Bryan looked at me and said, Yes, we are arent we? That was his proposal. It was decided we would plan a wedding for later that year. But, first I needed to meet Bryans mother.
Just the thought of it terrified me! Bryan and his mother, Sharon, have a rare bond. He insisted he would not tell anyone about our engagement until she and I met. We drove to southern California where Sharon, face painting pictures , was visiting her sister, Bryans aunt. I felt sick the entire trip. I knew in advance he was going to take, face painting pictures , his mother shopping the next morning alone to break the news to her. I couldnt sleep at all that night. What felt so right to Bryan and me was unusual, especially in the eyes of a parent. When they returned from their excursion Sharon looked like she had just come from a funeral. Fortunately, for me, Aunt Toby accepted the situation and eased the tension by giving me a white angel ornament. His mother is a wonderful woman. In spite of her disappointment, she welcomed me into their family. Over the years our relationship has evolved into a unique friendship,, face painting pictures , a cross between a peer and a sister.
December 7, 1986, dressed in an ivory colored Victorian gown, I was driven to our wedding in a horse drawn carriage. I remember the sensation well. As I heard the clip-pity clop of the hoofs hitting the pavement I felt it was the happiest day of my life. The ride was several miles long and I enjoyed cars honking loudly at every turn. When we arrived at the elegant Alamo Square Inn Bryan was waiting to escort me inside to, face painting pictures ,, face painting pictures , the nuptials. It was a good thing he took my hand, for as I exited the carriage, my knees collapsed from shaking so hard. The day was spectacular marking a lifetime of love.
Both Bryan and I had always wanted kids. By the time we met my biological clock had run out. He told me he would rather marry a woman he loved deeply than to wait for someone to bear his children. For several years we were content to be a unit of two. After my dear Aunt Letha died in 1992, face painting pictures , I longed for a child. Bryan agreed to adoption. It was an arduous experience requiring patience and resilience. We had several birthmothers who changed their minds for different reasons. This process took three years and a great deal of money. Ultimately we were blessed with a baby girl we named Mariah. Our daughter is now 8 years old and the light of our life. I am grateful I am able to be a good parent and I relish every moment I spend with both of them as a family.
Bryan continues to be my rock, strength and loving support. During our years together I have had many tragedies including: my brother Johns suicide in 1988, my ex- husband Joeys death from alcoholism in 1989, and my girlfriend Debras suicide in 2002. I was hospitalized with a potentially life threatening blood clot in my lungs in, face painting pictures , 1998. Bryan stood by me through all of these. I married a great guy! I am a fortunate woman to have found true love in the heart of a younger man.
Each day I thank God for the gifts I have been given. I see my world as peaceful and balanced. My mission is to inspire people to their own healing and recovery. It is truly possible to find serenity, joy and love. If I can do it, so can you.
To learn more about Kay Kopit visit: www.isurviveddocumentary.com
Contact: Rhonda Boudreaux
Office: 510-236-2668
Mobile: 510-236-2668
Source: articleage.com
It is amazing to be able to say I am a whole, happy, healthy, loving woman. I was sick for the first 40 years of my life. Like millions of other human beings I grew up immersed in the family disease of alcoholism. For generations it has plagued, face painting pictures , my family. The unbalanced life I led is so common in our society;, face painting pictures , I didnt know anything was wrong. I was a participant in the chaos, confusion, neuroses, pain and suffering which is present in dysfunctional families. I call it The Dance of Death.
I grew up in St. Louis, Missouri in the community of Clayton. The only memories I have of my father are when he would beat my brother and me with his belt so severely my clothes would cling to the bloody strap marks on my legs. He would make us wait for our punishment in our room, face painting pictures , before he dealt the ugly blows. My mother closed her eyes to what was happening. Both of them partied on weekends where I would find empty highball glasses scattered all over the living room. I had holes in th e soles of my shoes while my mother would model a new diamond cocktail ring, winnings from a weekly poker game. My dad was also a compulsive gambler. He died at the age of 45 when I was nine years old.
My mother attracted another alcoholic to her life soon, face painting pictures , after my fathers death. They had a symbiotic, codependent and addictive relationship. Every ten days they would consume a case of scotch which was delivered to our apartment from the local liquor store. My mother never, face painting pictures , appeared drunk but she was distant, selfish and narcissistic. My step fathers disease had progressed to the point he was visibly inebriated most evenings. His attitude was condescending, nasty and self righteous. He was verbally abusive and drove his car while intoxicated on many occasions. When I think back to that period of my history I remember keeping my, face painting pictures , personal, face painting pictures , life secret!!! I was ashamed of their behavior. I pretended all was well and I began developing neurotic habits for self preservation.
In my teens I danced several days after school, participated in theater groups, worked in a department store and had creative life in my head. I imagined the way I wanted my world to be and was in denial as to the truth in front of me. I became obsessive, compulsive and an over achiever. Because I worked so hard I accomplished a lot for a young girl but the reality was it was inspired by fear, insecurity and a need for control.
In college I devoted myself to art and earned a B.S. in Education and a M.A. in Painting and Ceramics from the University of Missouri. I was hired as a college instructor soon after graduate school. I felt happy for a time because I was away from home and involved in teaching. I took my job very seriously but the loneliness I felt when I was by myself was debilitating.
I longed for, face painting pictures , love . . . any kind. I didnt realize it at the time but I had never felt affection. I became preoccupied with thoughts of men. I had guys on my mind constantly! I was popular and had many choices but I picked the ones who I thought needed me. Most often they were from dysfunctional families. I dated a lot of drunks during my 20s. It felt familiar. In spite of my success as an artist and a teacher, I had low self esteem and I knew something was wrong with me.
In l969 I began a new life in another city. Within a week of, face painting pictures , moving to Boston, Massachusetts, I was brutally raped and hospitalized. I never received, face painting pictures , help with this trauma and didnt properly grieve until years later. I pushed down the pain and was then, more than ever, resolved to create the perfect life for myself, (as if it were in my hands?)
This, face painting pictures , was made easy for me when Joey Haudel entered my life. He filled the position of my Knight in Shining Armour, albeit, distorted. He was young, handsome, and alcoholic and had just been released from prison. We needed each other like ducks need water. We bonded in a codependent relationship that lasted 12 years.
Our experiences together, face painting pictures , were astounding. What I learned about myself was profound. Our journey is almost unbelievable. I have told this story in a dramatic narrative, I Survived: One Womans Journey of Self Healing and Transformation on DVD. It is filled with the dark world of illness and moves to the light of wellness. I reached my bottom after years of suffering. I was contemplating suicide but was saved by the Grace of God and the dear voice of a telephone operator who kept me on the phone for over an hour.
I spent years in recovery; beginning with Al-Anon meetings in 1973, several series of Adult Children of Alcoholic Therapy Sessions, individual therapy with numerous therapists and devouring self help books. I had the courage to look within and face the demons. It wasnt easy and many times I wanted to quit. I often felt I was too depressed to get well. One step at a time I forged ahead and never looked back! I visualized a healthy prognosis. Today I am living that beautiful picture!
I am happily married to a man 19 years my junior, face painting pictures , . What makes our relationship extraordinary is that my husband was born in 1960 the year after I graduated, face painting pictures , from high school. I am older than his mother. We recently celebrated our 17th anniversary and continue to share, face painting pictures , the most fabulous life. The secret of our success is our deeply committed love for one another. We enjoy a passionate romance. I wish what Bryan and I have could be sprinkled, face painting pictures , over the world like angel dust.
We met in 1985 during a rainy winter in San Francisco. , face painting pictures , We were neighbors on a tiny street near the historic Mission Dolores. The worst storm of the season was on its way and my roof was leaking profusely. I was in dire straits financially, having been newly divorced. I was preparing to fix it myself. Unfortunately my ladder wasnt tall enough. I needed help. None of the folks I knew were home that Saturday morning but I noticed an open door directly across from my house. I hurried upstairs to the second story flat in the azure painted duplex and walked down the long corridor to the living room. There on the sofa was a guy watching the football game on T.V. I introduced myself and then proceeded to ask for his assistance. He looked at me like I was nuts. The silence was deafening. How often does a stranger enter your apartment with a request for help with a major repair?, face painting pictures , I was flushed, face painting pictures , with embarrassment but was in, face painting pictures , too deep to recover. Fortunately he agreed to help me.
This uncommon beginning signaled the magic that lay before us. The sparks flew. We went on our first date within days of this meeting. Bryans car was broken so we took the bus across the city to an authentic Moroccan restaurant where we sat on paisley cushions and ate with our fingers. I remember clearly how primitive this felt and how natural it was to be with him. He didnt seem the least bit concerned about my age. I, on the other hand, was more sensitive. I was still healing from the codependent relationship of 12 years and had never experienced, face painting pictures , true intimacy. I wasnt sure it was the proper thing to do but I couldnt help myself; I was falling in love. I was scared because these, face painting pictures , feelings were coming so quickly.
Bryan moved in with me within weeks of our first meeting. I remember, face painting pictures , thinking if it didnt work out it would be easy to ask him to leave because all he owned was a T.V. For Valentines Day he created a hanging wire mobile in the shape of intertwined hearts and presented it to me with flowers and chocolate. This type of thoughtful gesture is typical of Bryan. He has never missed a special occasion and has often surprised me with jewelry when he returns from a business trip.
One evening in the spring we were waiting to board a dinner train in Mendocino. A drunken man approached us and said, How come you two are dressed up? Are you getting married? Bryan looked at me and said, Yes, we are arent we? That was his proposal. It was decided we would plan a wedding for later that year. But, first I needed to meet Bryans mother.
Just the thought of it terrified me! Bryan and his mother, Sharon, have a rare bond. He insisted he would not tell anyone about our engagement until she and I met. We drove to southern California where Sharon, face painting pictures , was visiting her sister, Bryans aunt. I felt sick the entire trip. I knew in advance he was going to take, face painting pictures , his mother shopping the next morning alone to break the news to her. I couldnt sleep at all that night. What felt so right to Bryan and me was unusual, especially in the eyes of a parent. When they returned from their excursion Sharon looked like she had just come from a funeral. Fortunately, for me, Aunt Toby accepted the situation and eased the tension by giving me a white angel ornament. His mother is a wonderful woman. In spite of her disappointment, she welcomed me into their family. Over the years our relationship has evolved into a unique friendship,, face painting pictures , a cross between a peer and a sister.
December 7, 1986, dressed in an ivory colored Victorian gown, I was driven to our wedding in a horse drawn carriage. I remember the sensation well. As I heard the clip-pity clop of the hoofs hitting the pavement I felt it was the happiest day of my life. The ride was several miles long and I enjoyed cars honking loudly at every turn. When we arrived at the elegant Alamo Square Inn Bryan was waiting to escort me inside to, face painting pictures ,, face painting pictures , the nuptials. It was a good thing he took my hand, for as I exited the carriage, my knees collapsed from shaking so hard. The day was spectacular marking a lifetime of love.
Both Bryan and I had always wanted kids. By the time we met my biological clock had run out. He told me he would rather marry a woman he loved deeply than to wait for someone to bear his children. For several years we were content to be a unit of two. After my dear Aunt Letha died in 1992, face painting pictures , I longed for a child. Bryan agreed to adoption. It was an arduous experience requiring patience and resilience. We had several birthmothers who changed their minds for different reasons. This process took three years and a great deal of money. Ultimately we were blessed with a baby girl we named Mariah. Our daughter is now 8 years old and the light of our life. I am grateful I am able to be a good parent and I relish every moment I spend with both of them as a family.
Bryan continues to be my rock, strength and loving support. During our years together I have had many tragedies including: my brother Johns suicide in 1988, my ex- husband Joeys death from alcoholism in 1989, and my girlfriend Debras suicide in 2002. I was hospitalized with a potentially life threatening blood clot in my lungs in, face painting pictures , 1998. Bryan stood by me through all of these. I married a great guy! I am a fortunate woman to have found true love in the heart of a younger man.
Each day I thank God for the gifts I have been given. I see my world as peaceful and balanced. My mission is to inspire people to their own healing and recovery. It is truly possible to find serenity, joy and love. If I can do it, so can you.
To learn more about Kay Kopit visit: www.isurviveddocumentary.com
Contact: Rhonda Boudreaux
Office: 510-236-2668
Mobile: 510-236-2668
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)